Mean Girls

I’m sure almost every one of you have been exposed to some sort of “mean girl” situation during your life. Maybe you were bullied by the means girls during middle school. Maybe you were (and possibly could still be) the mean girl who made the lives of your victims miserable. Or maybe you were just a spectator watching on as the mean girl antics were taking place right in front of you, never daring to step in because then you too might become the victim. No matter what your experience(s) has been, mean girls are out there—alive and well—making others feel bad about themselves just so the so-called mean one can temporarily feel in control or superior because her lack of self-esteem knows no better.

As a child I only recall one personal run-in with a “mean girl.” My friends and I were on the playground (on the swing-set if I remember correctly) of Gladeville Elementary School. A so-called friend was so mean to me while the others stood up for me. I remember going home sad, wondering how someone could be so mean.  Looking back now, she was mean to me because she was jealous that her friends liked me just as much as they liked her. Maybe she felt threatened…who knows? At this point, it doesn’t matter, but at the time it really hurt my feelings.

Since then I have witnessed many “mean girl” episodes throughout high school, as I was teaching middle school, and still today in my young adult life. I have had my fair share of “mean girl-women” encounters as well over the past few years. No matter the specific situation, there is a common denominator: the “mean girl” tries to hurt me to make herself feel better. From my viewpoint, she is jealous of me or my situation. I am the nice girl who gets attention because I am nice or because I help others or because I always have a smile on my face. I am no better than anyone, and I will be the first to admit that. One thing that does set me apart from some, however, is my huge self-esteem and the confidence that radiates from me. I guess some are threatened by that, who knows?! What I do know is that there are some girls out there who can’t handle it, so instead of being nice and having a great friend in me, they are mean…they purposely try to bring me, and others like me, down. By doing this, for some unknown reason, it makes them feel good about themselves. Pathetic, right! Yep! But it’s the truth, and unfortunately it is all around us.

So, the next time you are the target of a “mean girl,” just remember that 1) they are jealous of you and/or 2)putting you down is the only way they can feel good about themselves. Hold your head up, smile, and walk away knowing that you ARE the better person. And for the “mean girl” out there reading this, we’re onto you, and it’s fine. If that’s the only way to make yourself feel good about YOU, bring it. You can knock us down for a moment or two, but just know that we will only get up stronger and more determined to be that much greater than you.